Judge me if you must, but I’m all the way here for girlfriends who utilize the number two spot to their advantage. Whether we like to admit it or not, it takes a certain level of confidence to be okay with number two in a world where everyone is vying for first place. The mantras are limitless:
- If you’re not first, you’re last.
- Second place is just the first place loser.
- Winning isn’t everything, but it beats anything in second place.
- There is no such thing as second place. Either you’re first or you’re nothing.
No lie, I once bought into these phrases. So I can’t condemn you if you relate to them or agree that being anything but #1 is a waste of time.
But, I’ve gotta say that I’m pretty sure Pleasure P was on to something in 2008 when he said, “ 2nd place always got a whole lot to prove…I’ve got something to prove.”
Be real. Where’s the lie?
Ignore the Mantras
Number two is always willing to study the game and go the extra mile to validate why she deserves to be recognized. She does what those comfortably resting in the number 1 spot are unwilling to do because they don’t feel it necessary.
Girlfriend number two gets down and dirty to showcase the skills that set her apart. She studies number 1 to determine things she should mimic and things she should do different to make herself more valuable.
Say what you want, but that sounds like a winner to me- a top contender who’s hard to beat simply because she refuses to quit. Girlfriend number two is focused and dedicated to getting her end result. So help me understand what’s wrong with that?
We spend so much time wanting to be first that we miss one important thing: first doesn’t mean better. With anything, it’s the right effort that makes you successful in the end. Not whether someone else has already done it or seems to be winning while you’re still working to get to the finish line.
Don’t Be First, Be Right
As a married woman, I’d never encourage infidelity in any sense of the word. That’s not what this message is about. This message is about dream chasing and dedication to accomplishing your goals.
I’m here to remind you that being second doesn’t mean all is lost or that you shouldn’t go after the things that you want to achieve.
Stop rushing your process.
Understand that sometimes you have to slow down to get it right.
Just think: even if we workout, the results will be subpar if we do subpar work.
Simply put, the homie Drake says, “it’s not about who did it first, it’s about who did it right.” A short sermon that’ll preach.
Don’t be first, be right.
Combine consistency, patience, research, and a student mentality so that you’re prepared to shine in your moment. Don’t let social media, friends, family, or the accomplishments of others rush you. Being done means nothing if you get the answer wrong.
Greatness takes time. So what that someone else got a great paying job before you? or finished their course of study while you are still working to complete your prereqs? Does it matter if a friend opens her boutique before you’re able to get the capital to open yours? or has a husband + 2.5 kids while you’re still single?
Short answer: no.
What’s for you is for you regardless of who does it before you. Be girlfriend number 2 if necessary, but don’t settle just for the sake of saying you did it first.
Perhaps you feel me but you’re having a difficult time putting the plan into action. Maybe you’re struggling with consistency or have no idea where to get started. Here’s a FREE template to help you organize your goals and make them a reality. Simply sign up below for instant access.